How

How do you tell your sister-in-law, your friend, your wife's twin that life will get better? You don't know exactly what she's going through, even though you've been there before, it's always difference, but you know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel it's still on and you're there for her, next to her holding a candle to guide the way until she gets there? You know she feels alone, and it feels like she's burying herself alive one scoop of dirt at a time, but if with each drop of dirt, if she just steps forward eventually instead of getting buried she will come out on top. How do you keep from maiming the guy who broke her heart twice and every time he talks to her he jiggles that knife inside her heart, until it cuts right in half, how do you get this guy to realize he's not being anything but a bully and he just needs to stop talking to her, and even more how do you get her to realize she needs to stop talking to him, cause no matter what he was, what they shared, where they thought they'd be in 2, 5, 10, 40 years, all that changed when he decided this wasn't the life he wanted to lead, and yet SHE gave him a second chance, and he screwed her over again. When does he figure out that he makes it worse with every word? Why do we give so much of ourselves and invest so much time and love in others? Will it ever end? Where has the starlight gone?
Dark is the day
How can I find my way home?
Home is an empty dream
Lost to the night
Father, I feel so alone
I know that the night must end
And that the sun will rise
And that the sun will rise
I know that the clouds must clear
And that the sun will shine
And that the sun will shine
I know that the night must end
And that the clouds must clear
The sun
The sun will rise
The sun
The sun will rise
Brandy no one is ever worth giving up. I promise we're here for you, anytime you need us just pick up the phone, IM us, email us, call, text come by, whatever you need I promise we're here.

August 24th 2009 9:42 am

So we this morning started with 3 that's right 3 alarms going off at 4 am...What a way to start a Monday, but it's also the first day of School for my Brooke-o...Another semester at Weber State University, a school that I hope she soon gets her degree from. I know she's got 3 years left...I've got sooo much more than her, but I also started later...I'm a late starter I needed my time to make a mark on this world...No it never happened, so now my 20 year old wife and me are embarking on doing that together...Some day we will make our mark...
I decided to take the summer off from writing on here, ok so it really wasn't my decision, my company blocked websites, and this was one of them, but now it's been unlocked so I can speak my mind again!
School for me starts at 6 am on Wednesday, that's gunna be sooo much fun, but it's the only way I can fit the classes in that I need to take...I'm trying to hurry through my time at SLCC and get all my classes done so I can move to another school and get my teaching degree too...
So today, I feel like I have a bunch on my mind, but really I think it's just water on the brain or something...Things are going great, My wifey makes me the happiest man alive, she's sooo amazing I love her to death...I know I don't always show it, but I try really hard to make sure she knows it! She's my love, my life and my all!
Well before I say something stupid, I'm going to close...Hope everyone is happy today?

2 down...Too many to go

Well I've finished another semester at SLCC...And I did so much better this one than the last! I find myself at the start of summer and just wanting to take the summer off all together, no work, no school, no nothing. Sadly I have to work, but my loving wife Brooke-o is working across the street so I should be happy right? I have a chance to see her more often than not. I still want to be free, I miss having summer off...Luckily once I get done with school and Brooke and I start teaching we'll have summers just to be together...I can't wait it's been too long and life is too short to be spent in an office. I hate sharing an office, I wish I just had a cave I could hide in all day...Sigh...Wishful thinking...So it's Wednesday, Purple shirt day...I hope one day I can be in a different atmosphere than I am right now!

Short

It's Thursday...The only other day of the week that feels like Tuesday...It's just one of those days that it feels like the week will never end...I know it's almost over but I want Friday already! I hate to sound like a broken record but Im really tired of having to work...I wish I could hurry up with school and get onto my career...I know this in only my first semester but it feels like I've already been in school forever which isn't good since I have too many years to count to go in it still! I wish I had more to say...I love my wifey...She's the bestest thing a guy could ask her...I miss her, but I know Ill get her tonight...Not looking forward to going to class first but I'll live, maybe it wont be so bad. Miss you Wifey hope you're happy today?! MUAH

The show must go on

I try my best to make things interesting and fun...I try to be easy going and not get upset easily, but somedays I just can't handle the stress of it all...Sometimes I just need a break, but I can't take that break yet, the show must go on whether I'm here or there, I must strive to make a difference in everyone else's lives, I am nothing more than I want to be, and if it hurts to see where I will lead you, close your eyes and hold on tight for I will lead you only to the place you wanna be...There are few times in life I have been truly happy but ever since I met Brooke it's been the most amazing and happy ride of my life, I couldn't live without her! There have always been times that I've needed my space, but I ALWAYS need Brooke...Sometimes things happen that turn you into the person you're supposed to be, Brooke has made me laugh, cry, smile, and feel alive...She's my everything and nothing will ever change the way I feel about her...

2009

Nothing really to say, it's monday January 5th 2009...Wow 2009 I'll be 24 this year, I'm getting old and trying to get on top of life...School shouldn't be to bad...I just dont wanna be stuck working at a dead end job for much longer...I mean I love being busy, and I like money, but it's not enough to support Brooke and I. I can't live without my wife and I love working at Hale, if it paid more that would be great, but for the amount of work I do here, it's not as much as I wish I was getting. I do the most work, true I'm sitting here at my desk not really doing anything but it's the first of the month after a long weekend, my brain is still back in bed sleeping, I wish I was! But I guess it's the season to make new years resolutions, I don't know where it came from maybe I should figure that out? But this year I think my resolve is...
1. Get back into a shape other than round
2. Continue treating my wife like the Goddess she is
3. Get temple worthy
4. Find a better paying job
5. Stay in school and work hard to get better jobs
6. Save money
I think that's about it? Sigh what a boring day...I wish I could go home, if only we didn't need the money?! Oh well such is life...At least it's almost 3...2 more hours better than it being 11 still!

Rules

Why is it that rules only "apply" to some people and not everyone. In every job I've ever had there have been rules but those rules only apply to the people who are too scared to act against them, but the second you get on the other side of the line they no longer apply...There are always rules but as long as you follow the simplest amout people dont notice all the things you're doing wrong...I've been on both sides...Right now at least at Hale I'm in limbo I don't necessarily doing things wrong but I'm not necessarily following the letter of the law either...I'm just doing things the way I've always done them...So I'm not perfect I'll admit it, but I do things better than everyone else and I stay outta trouble...That's what it's all about right?! I know it's short but I lost my fire...